My Review of Desertion
I was excited to read the story about Jesse and Bell since I first met them in Incandescent. Jesse is a “bad boy” MC biker who was a firefighter and a marine. One reason he sleeps with many women is to shut out the pain he suffers from the demons of his past. Bell is a shy, innocent nurse who is afraid to stand up for her own happiness.
As I read this book, I was forced to feel the hurt Jesse suffers and understand why he hides it from his family, both MC and personal. They fall in love and it is Jesse’s love for Bell that gives her the strength to want her own happiness. And Bell’s love made Jesse want to be a better man. They go through some rough patches, at one point I thought it was over. This book is an emotional roller coaster, I couldn’t put it down till I finished it. But Jesse and Bell didn’t give up and realized that their love will heal their brokenness.
I also am guilty of falling in love with Jesse. I loved his wanting to forgive himself , his bravery and even his lame pick- up lines. River Savage has written her best book so far, and I highly recommend it to anyone who believes in the healing power of love. I give it 5 stars ( it deserves 10)
I wake up to the heat of someone’s palm against my shoulder. Twisting around, my hand moves faster than my brain, and I snatch it off me.
“Jesse, it’s me, Bell,” she rushes out before I can take it any further.
“Fuck.” I release my grip on her arm and sit up, forcing myself back to the here and now.
“Did I hurt you?” I reach for her searching for any sign of a mark left by me.
“It’s fine. You barely touched me.” She holds her arm out letting me inspect it. I check it over one more time before releasing her and relaxing.
“You wanna talk about it?” I study her face, eyes calm, soft mouth. She’s not freaking out.
“Just some shit that visits my dreams sometimes, nothing that needs to touch you,” I reply, shocked I’m not retreating.
“I don’t mind, Jesse,” she pushes, and I almost cave. Almost.
“The last thing I want to do is talk about this shit, Bell.” She doesn’t argue or press, and I’m grateful for it. I don’t think I’d be able to keep my cool if she did.
“Come back to sleep.” She lies back down and I follow her. She doesn’t ask me any more questions, or make me feel like I need to tell her everything.
“That ever happens again, don’t wake me,” I warn. A menacing thought strikes through me picturing what could have happened if I didn’t wake in time. She’s lucky I didn’t hurt her, like the last time a woman touched me while I had a nightmare.
“You don’t always have to be so brave, Jesse.” Her hand moves to my dog tags. I don’t stop her. I’m starting to like the feeling of her hands touching them.
“Never tried to be, Bell. But talking doesn’t help me. Never has.” I think back to the time when I did try and it forced me out of control. Talking about those triggers only amplified my insecurities. When death sits afar, mocking you in the dangerous confines of your surroundings, it fucks with your head; nothing was going to change it.
Besides, my issues weren’t what I had done. They were what I had survived. My conscience wasn’t clear and my honor wasn’t clean.
“Promise me you won’t touch me.” I keep my tone even, controlled.
“I promise.” I take her hand in mine and bring it to my lips. Maybe one day I will let someone in. Let her in.
Today isn’t that day.
But today, I didn’t push her away.
That has to count for something.
including the following:
Paperback set of the Knights Rebels series,